Do people in the Northeast use this term? Whenever I use it in conversation people give me the puzzled look. For those of you who are NOT familiar, feeling hard done by is simply feeling that you've been cheated in some aspect of your life, either by specific people or organizations, or life in general. The feeling can be valid or invalid, but since "hard done by" is all relative I'd have to say it's usually invalid... relatively speaking. Certainly there are people, say... in Sierra Leone that should have my WORST problems.
Anyway, this brings me to anger. Generally anger comes from the feeling that you've been hard done by. I don't mean momentarily pissed off, but the condition of walking around with a lot of baggage. I was recently accused of being an angry person, ironically by one of the most generally pissed off people I've met in a long time... but it didn't make it untrue.
DISCLAIMER: I'M NOT ABOUT TO GET DEEPLY PERSONAL HERE. I AM NOT OPENING A VEIN.
Yes, I've come to realize in recent years that I'm one of those people who sometimes needs a reminder that shit really isn't so bad at all. I've even gotten to the point where I recognize the sensation of bile rising before it comes up and manifests itself in some ugly statement or observation. Yay me! Right? Don't worry, I'm not patting myself on the back yet. Life is a work in progress and all that.
But I now recognize it in other people too... quite a few people... but recognition of the source (usually pain) makes it a whole lot easier to navigate the world of angry people. There are a lot of us out here who often feel that we just haven't gotten out of something what we've put into it. Something or everything. Perhaps one level of self awareness is knowing that you've gotten exactly what you've put into it... perhaps not. Perhaps that's a level of self-loathing also. But I've never quite reached there. Recognition though, leads to compassion and empathy.
Angry people: Some are clearly more angry than others. One of them filtered into my world just yesterday while I was at work. A really angry one... and fortunately this wasn't a prospective mate, or a violent encounter. I was just sitting there going about my work business when a rather long fax came through from a really pissed off guy named Kazuhiro from Yokohama. Kazu's gripe, apparently, is that "Japanese Cursed Satans" have taken control of their National Police Agency and the staffs of their major hotel chains--and furthermore if it's not addressed immediately then natural disasters will start to level civilization. Nobody is listening and Kazu is really really pissed off:
"Unless you take "Japanese Cursed Satans" away by 2007. Nov. 30, the probability that The Natural Disaster begins to happen from the beginning of 2008 is Very High. That's Natural Disaster will be severe gradually. Then, The Probability of All the People of All the Worldwide to die is Very High by 2011, Dec. 24.
(edit. note: This guy makes Al Gore look positively cheerful.)
***And one of the "Natural Disasters" is evidently an underground nuclear war with No. 5 planet. Hmmmmm****
So Kazu's solution is that all these police and bellhops and chambermaids should be rounded up and dosed up with "confession medicine." Then we find out if they're Christians or Muslims or Buddhists and find out about their "Various Thoughts" and "Various Plans." And after that we continue to "do torture to each Japanese Cursed Satan." The prescription, and I quote:
"You should prepare doctors and nurses. You are supposed to be able to cope with it with blood transfusio., the intravenous drip, and so on fully to Satans. You don't need to use transfusions to Satans. You should stamp the brand (carved seal) of 666 on Satans forehead to Satans. You should cut mans and womans Satans pubic hair with a knife. You should cut mans Satans penis in the root with scissors. You should put may glass pieces in the womans ***and it gets grim here*** Then you should dedicate Satans penes to offer a sacrifice for God."
I don't remember God ever calling for penile sacrifice anywhere in the Bible... but what's my point here? I guess my point is, Kazuhiro is a miserable bastard. It really must feel awful to walk around with all this anger and fear. My anger doesn't compare on any level... so even as far as feeling hard done by goes, I haven't been hard done by. And of course I'm not a paranoid schizophrenic so that's something to feel good about (Reasons to be cheerful, part 2). That's just another reason to face this day with positivity.
My lesson for myself each morning. Let go.